*This essay is part of my series on feminism. To understand it, you must have read my “Feminism Basics” intro.*
First we must start with a few definitions and go over what femme and femmesexism mean. I am not using terms that include [x]phobia/[x]phobic because systems of oppressions are not phobias, and using such language perpetuates ableism. However, some of the articles I quote and link to do use those terms. I am not disagreeing with the content of any of the articles, merely the terminology.
Femme: Is “a descriptor for a queer person who presents and acts in a traditionally feminine manner” (source).
Femmesexism: Is “the fear or hatred of all people and things which are perceived as femme, feminine, effeminate, and/or twink, regardless of their gender” (source).
Queer: “One definition of queer is abnormal or strange. Historically, queer has been used as an epithet/slur against people whose gender, gender expression and/or sexuality do not conform to dominant expectations. Some people have reclaimed the word queer and self identify as such. For some, this reclamation is a celebration of not fitting into norms/being “abnormal.” Manifestations of oppression within gay and lesbian movements such as racism, sizeism, ableism, cissexism, transmisogyny as well as assimilation politics, resulted in many people being marginalized, thus, for some, queer is a radical and anti-assimilationist stance that captures multiple aspects of identities.” (source; see more on this here).
Femme is just a queer feminine person. That's it. Queer and feminine are the only requirements. However, 99% of the articles on the web are about femme lesbians. There is nothing wrong with being a femme lesbian, but a large number of femme's aren't lesbians.
It is crucial to understand the nuances of femmesexism, because it is one of the biggest roadblocks on our way to equality.
